The biggest mistake you can make in your relationship is to have your partner do most of the chores around the house. The responsibility for those chores doesn’t belong to just one person, as they are shared and dividing up the housework is a significant step toward a happy relationship.
Tips on How to Arrange Cleaning Chores With Your Partner
Learn About Priorities
You need to set your priorities together as a couple, what is essential to each of you, how you can divide the chores so both of you can be happy, and so forth. Domestic disorder doesn’t bother some people, while it makes others lose their minds, so you should be aware of the best way to find a compromise that works for both of you. You should focus on the priorities instead of ultimately trying to satisfy the needs of both partners. Keep it realistic for optimal results.
You should discuss how both of you feel about things like home-cooked meals versus eating out and quick meals at home, then find out each other’s feelings about house cleaning, setting things in order, paying bills, etc. If you feel the toilet must be cleaned every three days or so, make sure you discuss that with your partner to reach an understanding.
Sit together and create a list of the chores you hate to do. What one hates, the other may tolerate or like doing. If both of you hate doing a certain chore, find a way to compromise that helps get it done fairly. Maybe you can tackle the unpleasant task together as a couple.
Agree on a Timetable
It’s essential to consider the time people are most active, such as some people being energetic in the mornings while others are more energetic at night. Forcing your partner to do a chore when they’re really out of their depth will only create more issues, so make sure you understand the importance of timing.
Touch Base on a Plan Each Week
Let one another know well ahead of time what the coming week will be like – what errands must be done, any special occasions that require a change of plans, etc. Decide who does what and make a list, then post it in a visible spot as a reminder for both of you. Don’t nag about the list or what needs to be done; if the task hasn’t been done by next week, you should sit down and discuss your expectations.
If one of you isn’t following through on your promises to share the workload around your home, you should try to understand why such a reluctance is there. Sometimes when one partner overcommits or underestimates the time it takes to get something done, they feel like it’s too much. Blaming your partner for what hasn’t been accomplished is not an effective way to go. Reevaluate your plans if need be and adjust them accordingly. You should be flexible and allow your partner to accomplish things their way. If you believe a task has to be done in a particular way, then maybe you should do it yourself to be sure.
If you can’t or won’t lower your standards, you can still hire outside help if your budget allows. It will take some organisation to make a list of tasks, hire a company to clean your bathrooms, shine windows, vacuum, dust, iron, mend and take down seasonal items, et cetera. This should not be viewed as help for either partner but for both.